My Mother is a person who likes to do a “big” shopping once a month and supplement as needed during the following weeks. And even though she no longer drives, cooks or can stand for long periods of time, she insists on keeping this ritual. In an effort not to change everything in her world, I oblige.
At the beginning of this time—you know of me being a Caregiver—she would accompany me inside the Grocery Store and attempt to put all the items on her list into her shopping cart. As I rushed around the store finding the items on the list as if I was on a scavenger hunt, she never made it past aisle one. Aisle #1 houses Fruits and Vegetables.
After about 5 of these escapades, and the onset of Covid, she no longer came into the store with me but remained in the car. In this state, there were Covid regulations which restricted the hours when people over 60 could be in the store. The Senior hours were from 8-9am and implied that people under 60 could not be in the store during those hours. That retail restriction was a silver lining in a Covid cloud.
Although she no longer physically shopped, she created the shopping list. As her Caregiver, I do ALL of the cooking. I stock the shelves and know what is in the cabinets. Yet she prepared the list. You can see how that was absolutely ridiculous.
Keep in mind that she has her mind set on specific brands. Did you know that there seems to be a noticeable difference between the two most popular brands of Raisin Bran cereal? Well, I didn’t because I don’t like raisins or eat cereal. Consequently, I typically buy the wrong brand. In the beginning, I purchased everything on her list or tried to because as her Daughter (an Unpaid Relative), I wanted to please her.
I like to think that I learn from my mistakes. Now I make the list which includes all of her favorites—most of which I don’t eat. And for the last two months, I ordered online for grocery delivery. I still personally shop for Seafood, Meats and Vegetables; however, I have made the Personal Shopper Caregiver duties much easier.
The Grocery Store is one of my least favorite places and so I find this entire activity exhausting. After wandering up and down the aisles of the market, I have to unload the groceries. It generally takes me 4-5 trips to bring all of the items in the house. Then, I have to unpack and put everything in its proper place.
Perhaps you’re thinking that this doesn’t sound too difficult and that everyone has to go to the Grocery Store. I am single with no children. Breezing through Trader Joes and cruising by the Farmers Market on a Sunday morning every now and then is simply not the same.
The last time that I went to the Grocery Store for a massive shopping, I drank an energy drink. I arrived at the Cashier to check out and handed her the empty can. She took one look at my shopping cart and said, “I think the store should buy you this drink.”
I really must mention that for some reason, try as I might, I never seem to buy the right Raisin Bran. Now I’m beginning to wonder if she changes her mind about which brand really is her favorite. Things that make you go “Hmm.”
Well Young Hemingway, I believe you’ve nailed it!!! With humor and some unspoken contempt(lol), my hat is off to you and all those who supply the Sacred service of Caregiver. It takes a special person to wear the shoes of a care giver. A special heart, for truly it may not always be ease to provide the level of caring that is required to meet the task at hand. This is where you get your “Angel WIngs”!!! Not in the boardrooms of Coca-Cola or GM, no, not there, but here with one that means the world to you, your mom♡ So me and the company of Angels give you a standing round of applause for doing what is needed in the moment.
The Sacred Service of Caregiver. This is not a sentence, but a privilege to serve in this capacity.
Peace and Abundant Blessings Young Hemingway♡!!
Your favorite cousin, Ananda♡