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THE CAREGIVER’S LIST

May 29, 2024

THE LIST

“THE LIST” means something entirely different to a Caregiver than it may mean to others. “The List” used to mean different things to me too.

I grew up here in New England where we spend a considerable amount of time learning about the history of New England—the 13 original Colonies and all.

The first list covered in our Education is “Mrs. Astor’s 400.” According to the Gilded Age of History, Mrs. Astor’s list is a list of the Who’s Who in society. It was more or less an invitation list to the best of everything—a list one may aspire to be on; yet a list that one must be born onto.

Then there are the traditional Wait Lists—the wait list for College, the wait list for the Dorms, and the wait list for that one class you have to take. Followed closely by the Dean’s list for Graduates who strive for great achievement.

“THE LIST” the Caregiver is concerned with has nothing to do with History or Education.

After College, I ran to Los Angeles where there exists all manner of lists.

The Hollywood Blacklist is a historical list (late 1940s thru late 1950s) representing the power of the Entertainment Industry. The “Hollywood Blacklist,” refers to a list of Actors, Directors, Producers and Writers who were banned from working due to suspicions of Communist involvement or affinity to the cause. The original list was comprised of 10 Individuals—nine of whom were Writers.

ANY “VIP LIST” is “THE” List to be on in Los Angeles. These lists provide access to the Parties, Clubs, Events, and Activities that the rest of the world watches on Screen.

As a Caregiver, these lists are fond memories of another life. In my Caregiver life, I am only concerned with one list. And this list has nothing to do with Entertainment.

THE LIST FOR THE ASSISTED LIVING FACILITY

Unlike lists of the past, this list operates differently. One can advance on the College lists in a variety of ways—students change their minds, take other classes or decided that having fun is more important that good grades.

In Hollywood, it’s about knowing key people, being in the right places, and excelling in various high visibility professions.

THE LIST FOR THE ASSISTED LIVING FACILITY

Being added to this list is not easy. If you want to put it in Educational terms—consider it a project assignment in your least favorite class. It takes tons of research, a deep commitment, a lot of time, and a little luck.

First, the Caregiver must research the multitude of Facilities in order to determine exactly which one is the most appropriate. Then there is an application/interview/acceptance process—much like those College lists.

Once completed successfully, there is “THE LIST.” This is a list of individuals waiting for space to move into the Assisted Living Facility.

At this time, I am only commenting on “THE LIST” itself without mentioning that one must figure out how to handle the financial commitment and the emotional adjustments of Assisted Living.

That being said, every so often someone asks me, “Where are you on THE LIST?”

It takes a minute, but I must remember, they are not referring to any list with which I have been familiar…

They are referring to:

THE LIST FOR THE ASSISTED LIVING FACILITY

It is the only list on my mind these days. The thing is, in order to advance on this particular list, someone has to die.

I think it may be easier to get on Mrs. Astor’s list or…

There is always, the FBI’s Most Wanted List!