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FINANCIALLY IN BETWEEN

April 13, 2022July 6, 2022

Financially In Between

Every once in a while, I wonder. I wonder how it is that I have ended up here as a Caregiver. And as the most common of Caregivers—the Unpaid Relative.

The answer is simple really.

My Mother is in the un-enviable position of being “financially in-between” And her situation is not unique. It is a position that a great many Americans face. At this time, in this Country it seems that the elderly people are penalized rather than rewarded for having worked hard to achieve the “American Dream.”

My Mother, like many women worked hard to provide a good life for herself and her children following a divorce from my father. But that’s a different story. Anyway, she worked as an Executive Assistant, went back to College, also furthered her education earning a Graduate Degree, and then Founded and Directed a Cultural Arts Center. The events and activities that the Cultural Arts Center established still continue in this state today. My Mother was a force to be reckoned with in the Arts.

At the same time, my Brothers and I attended private schools, went to summer camp, took music and dance lessons and enjoyed receiving everything on our Christmas lists. We were blessed to have childhoods that we remember fondly.

Throughout her career, my Mom earned enough money which entitles her to a respectable monthly Social Security payment. A respectable amount if one does not get older, sick, or require any assistance. In those cases, the Social Security income goes from being “respectable” to “not even close to enough.”

Due to her prior income and minimal pension, she does not qualify for any State assistance. She pays for Private Health Insurance and has a co-pay for many tests, procedures, and medications. These payments make it cost prohibited to pay for the Assistance of a Home Health Care provider. And Assisted Living keeping her living in the manner in which she is accustomed is an unattainable dream. After several in-depth conversations with “A Place for Mom,” and the State Department of Elderly Affairs along with hours of research, I concluded that the source of help and assistance for my Mother would come directly from the three of us—Me, Myself, and I. And that is the short story of how I have become a Caregiver.

I’m sure you’ve heard of those programs where a relative who acts as a Caregiver can receive payment for those duties. Not in this state—not unless you receive state financial assistance. My Mother’s private insurance plan does offer the added benefit of $50.00 annually. Yes, fifty dollars per year to give to your Caregiver. I would be highly insulted if I didn’t find it so amusing. And I may toss the TV out the window if I see one more commercial with Joe Montana, Jimmy Walker or other miscellaneous celebrities spouting the advantages of the Medicare Advantage. Just so you know this particular advantage does not apply to the “financially in between.” Like we’re really supposed to believe that Joe Montana relies on that service for rides to Senior Sports Therapy!

I know that my Mother’s situation is not at all un-common. And I’ve heard that the current Administration both locally and nationally is “Senior Friendly,” I imagine that to mean that they are aware of the flaws in the system and are working to fix things. Keep in mind that as a Writer, I have quite the imagination.

In the meantime, these “financially in between” senior citizens are caught in the middle of a Health Care system that seemingly punishes these individuals. People who although they worked hard throughout their lifetime, are not amongst the small percentage of those who have made enough money to afford to live as they always have while obtaining the assistance that they now require.

The reason that the most popular Caregiver is an Unpaid Relative is quite simple–because a great percentage of the elderly population is Financially In Between. And the Brinks truck always seems to be going in the wrong direction!